A South Texas Christmas Eve

10:00 AM

Pop “wraps” Mom’s Christmas presents and delivers paper bags at the ranch

12:00 PM

Mom prints coupons for free Whataburgers and Pop makes stranger take iPhoto of us with our coupons while at Whataburger

Caleb is embarrassed

1:00 PM

Put on White Christmas or horrible Lifetime Christmas movie for napping

Pop or Andrea-Icebox blanket

Mom-Red quilt

Morgan-Pink quilt

Caleb-I’m not sure what blanket has been officially titled his

3:00 PM

Used to be time to bathe, but Morgan and Andrea have revolted

They sing Christmas songs and then fight in the bathroom

4:00 PM

Family photo in front of the Christmas tree, handguns optional

5:00 PM

Church at St. Dennis, leading Sheriff to ranch hands optional

Sing in Spanish

Chit Chat after church

7:00 PM

Stop at Moo-Moos for Dr. Peppers

7:15 PM

Go-Go yells at us because we’re late—we tell her that we like to go to church at

the ranch

7:30 PM

Gorging on tamales, cheese dip, various pickled items like herring, shrimp, and pickles

8:00 PM

Family photo—assigned seating

8:30 PM

Gift opening

New tradition—Caleb gets everyone drunk

10:00 PM

Drive home with the windows down

11:00 PM

Santa comes early (only after 2004 snow)

Fire is lit even though it’s 85 degrees outside and we burn all trash whether appropriate or not

2:30 AM

Morgan’s the last one to bed

Merry Christmas Y'all!